The Sports Truth

While the Sports Truth’s college football Pundit believes the University of Southern California to be overrated (and predicted its demise in the title game last January), there’s little doubt that the Trojans are in the midst of a dynasty. From 2002 on, USC is 57-5 with two national championships, a near miss last season, and an outside chance at another title in 2006-07. Let that sink in for a moment.

In watching USC clinch its 120th straight Pac-10 championship Saturday night with a 23-9 win over California, the true force behind the school’s incredible run became evident. Not to take away from Heisman winners Matt Leinart and Reggie Bush, or the terrific coaching of Pete Carroll, but let’s just say the most impressive Booty on the field last weekend was not quarterback John David.

The USC cheerleaders, or “Song Girls” as they call themselves, are a sight to behold. Normally, the Sports Truth would refrain from writing a column such as this. Oh, who are we kidding. These girls need to come out with a calendar or something. Maybe it’s just that to someone who has lived in the Northeast his whole life, SoCal is something of a phenomenon, a place that holds a certain allure and fascination.

Think about it, though. With these kinds of perks, how does USC not sign every recruit it wants? Even the regular student body is out of some kind of catalog. Not to mention the weather there. Matt Leinart, a consensus #1 pick in the NFL draft after his Heisman-winning junior season, took one class (ballroom dancing) to stay eligible and play another year at USC. That tells you all you need to know.

I’m sorry, but they’re simply not playing fair when going up against the likes of Washington State. USC football is the biggest game, surpassing even the Lakers, in the biggest town in the U.S. How does that happen? Not by accident. Whoever prevails in Saturday’s Notre Dame game is anyone’s guess, but I’ll be pulling for the Trojans. I feel a strong amount of school spirit all of a sudden.

In closing, here’s a little background info on the USC Song Girls, so as not to come across as a blatantly chauvinistic piece extolling the virtues of beautiful young women. They are beautiful, yes - and athletic, and well-rounded. According to the group’s official site, they formed in 1967 as a group of seven young women who walked onto the field of the L.A. Coliseum to cheer the Trojans to victory.

Forty years and many championships (for both the football team and Song Girls) later, the women, now numbering an even dozen, look effervescent as ever in their trademark white uniforms trimmed with cardinal and gold. The Song Girls perform three dozen new dance routines each year! In addition to their rigorous training and travel schedules, they find time for various philanthropic endeavors. They are smart, talented women with varying backgrounds and career goals. Go team!

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It was a wild week, rabid Pundit fans! Ohio State and Michigan dominated and are now gearing up for what many are calling the unofficial national title game. Louisville succumbed to the pressure and got dumped by Rutgers. Texas lost Colt McCoy and allowed a surging Kansas State team to knock them out if the hunt (at least until someone else loses).

Finally, Auburn looked like total sh!t against once-bumbling Georgia, and the Gators snuck by sleeper South Carolina (watch this team next year). The new tally: 34-10 for the year. Calling the spread on Louisville, OSU, and Michigan. PUNDIT DOMINANCE AGAIN! Holla at your boy!

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THE PUNDIT’S POWER FIVE

1. Ohio State. Northwestern got beat up worse than the Pundit predicted. Holla, Troy Smith.
Next week’s opponent: Michigan
Prediction: This comes down to who makes the big play in the big moment. Since both teams have some serious play makers and have shown some serious ability to handle their business, the pundit is calling a shootout that goes to OT. Ted Ginn, Jr., and Alex Smith hook up for huge yardage in the game and is the difference. 38-35 for the Buckeyes.

2. Michigan. The Hoosiers died down the stretch as predicted. The Pundit should be getting some serious love by now. Holla!
Next week’s opponent: Ohio State
Prediction: See above. This is the game where we find out how good Mario Manningham really is. The Pundit is predicting a one-season wonder who flops in the NFL.

3. Florida. A great grudge match win against the Gamecocks. Was there a soap opera feel to this one or what?
Next week’s opponent: Western Carolina
Prediction: Florida should annihilate these guys. They are like 10 pounds of monkey sh!t in a five-pound bag. This is crucial game for the Gators to get healthy! Gators by 6 TDs.

4. USC. Okay, they ripped Oregon pretty good. The Pundit wants to see them versus Notre Dame and Cal before he passes final judgement.
Next Week’s Opponent: California
Prediction: The Bears had been on a tear until getting dumped last week by Arizona (ol’ Tedy Bruschi probably got the biggest boner of his life upon hearing this news). Both teams have explosive offensives and Cal was the last one to beat the Trojans before the Oregon State Beavers did it this season. The Pundit is taking USC at home by a touchdown. They will find some annoying way to win this game.

5. Arkansas. It took the Pundit awhile, but he will finally recognize the Razorbacks after thumping a hot Tennessee team: without the QB, Mustain, who had gotten them there too. The Pundit awards big sack points to Coach Houston Nutt on that one.
Next Week’s Opponent: Mississippi State
Prediction: They suck and Arkansas should roll them up good. Hogs by 35.

Teams Most Likely to Break Into the Top Five: The field is thinning out. Rutgers needs to dump WVU at home to move up there. The Pundit thinks Louisville was set up perfectly for the fall, so the Knights have to prove themselves against another heavyweight. Sneaky prediction - they wont get it done. Notre Dame’s wins over service academies are not helping them at all.

NOTE: Unfortunately for the rabid Pundit readership (which is probably the only thing keeping this lame, chimp-edited site alive), the Pundit can only drop half his usual knowledge this week due to time constraints. The Pundit didn’t want to miss the big week altogether, though. Holla!

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30-8 for the year… Calling the winner, and pretty much the total points in the WVU-Louisville game… Calling John L. Smith’s firing by Michigan State… Can anyone even hold the Pundit’s jock? Ha!

The only thing that is reining in the Pundit’s total obnoxiousness and basking in his own glory is the lack of oomph from the Buckeyes and Wolverines, who both almost got caught sleeping by vastly inferior teams. Lloyd Carr and Jim Tressel better get it back in gear this week or face some serious Pundit retribution.

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THE PUNDIT’S POWER FIVE

1. Ohio State. Illinois game them more of a game than most thought. The Pundit thinks they were looking ahead to the clash with Michigan and the national title implications therein.
Next week’s opponent: Northwestern
Prediction: This game could be a slip up for the Buckeyes. They have to be very careful, because once or twice a year, Northwestern could light it up. The Buckeyes will get slightly back on track before the big showdown in Ann Arbor with the Wolverines next week. OSU by 21.

2. Michigan. The Wolverines need to get Mario Manningham some work in this game to get ready for Ohio State. They will struggle a bit a first but should handle Indiana in the end.
Next week’s opponent: Indiana
Prediction: Like Ohio State, this could be land mine game for Michigan. They will get the win here but it won’t be easy at times. UM by 17.

3. Louisville. The Cards exposed the flaw in the Mountaineers with the money passing of Brian Brohm (right). However, this game also showed that the Cards are vulnerable to the run. With Rutgers up next, this could spell trouble.
Next week’s opponent: Rutgers
Prediction: The Pundit is going to take the upset here in a surprise move. Rutgers by 3 or 7 in a barn burner. With a healthy Steve Slaton, the Pundit thinks WVU might have pulled out a win. Ray Rice is like Slaton, but might even be better. He also has a great blocking fullback in Bryan Leonard, who is nasty out of the backfield and who rushed for over 2,000 yards the first three years of his career. The Cards can’t pass the ball if the Scarlet Knights control the clock with their nasty running game at home.

4. Texas. The Longhorns handled the Oklahoma State Cowboys. Colt McCoy is the best freshman QB out there (sorry Mitch Mustain of Arkansas… you’re good but not that good).
Next Week’s Opponent: Kansas State
Prediction: The Wildcats are playing better but the Pundit doesn’t think they have the juice to take this one on the road. Longhorns by 28.

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[Cue The Pundit’s Patented Loud Booming Voice, Pulsing Intro Music & Pyrotechnics]

The Pundit would like to apologize to his rabid fan base for neglecting them this past week. The Pundit simply didn’t have to time to drop his knowledge on the masses with the usual vigor and quality that is his calling card.

The Pundit knows what you are all thinking. “Pundit, you got lazy on one of the best weeks of the year! USC gets dropped, Miami’s whole team almost gets arrested, and almost every top 10 team had a barnburner!”

The Pundit’s response is thus: “Piss off. You still don’t have the game-calling acumen that the Pundit does!” At last count, the Pundit’s record was 22-8 with some money spread calls to boot. Let’s make that 26-8 with the pundit’s week 4-0 Week 8 results. The Pundit asks, “Who is still your daddy when it comes to college football?”

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THE PUNDIT’S POWER FIVE

1. Ohio State. Another two teams (Indiana and Minnesota) get stomped on by the Buckeyes. Next!
Next week’s opponent: Illinois
Prediction: The schedule gods must have been getting hummers from Jim Tressel for this gift of a schedule. Buckeyes by 35 in a snoozer.

2. Michigan. The Wolverines showed their blue-collar side with tough wins over Iowa and Northwestern. The lack of firepower is getting the Pundit thinking that Ohio State is going to be in the BCS title game… that is, unless Mario Manningham gets back ahead of schedule.
Next week’s opponent: Ball State
Prediction: The Pundit guesses that Lloyd Carr must have only given the schedule gods a handjob because this gift falls after two tough conference games. Michigan in another Big 10 snooze fest by 35. Sidenote: The Ball State Cardinals are one of the worst teams in college football… ever!

3. West Virginia. They handled the Huskies and then get a bye right before the Louisville game. Does the Pundit smell a letdown?
Next week’s opponent: Louisville
Prediction: This is hands down one of the games of the year! Two of the most explosive and nastiest offenses in the country are going to shoot it out over what is looking to be a BCS championship run and the Big East title. Ka-Ching! The Pundit is feeling Louisville in a wild and crazy game, and calling the total score just for fun. These teams will drop 80+ points in this one!

4. Louisville. The Cards beat up on Cincinatti and Syracuse, two very scrappy teams. This is a big advantage in their matchup with the Mountaineers, because they didn’t have much of a chance for a let down.
Next week’s opponent: West Virginia
Prediction: See Above

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The situation was nightmarish.

Somehow, with 8:00 to go in the third quarter, Michigan State had managed to fall behind to Northwestern by a score of 38-3. My friend Chris and I were sitting in the bleachers in Evanston, pawing through an old Wall Street Journal and wondering why we were still there. I don’t think we were talking much by that point, except to wonder aloud whether head coach John L. Smith had already been fired via headset.

Then, as you may be aware, Michigan State f*%king won.

My team, the team I watch every Saturday, the team that lets me and my dad and his dad down somewhere between 5-8 times every season, scored 38 unanswered points in a quarter and a half.

They scored five touchdowns and a field goal in seven possessions, none of which lasted longer than four minutes, to win, 41-38. This sort of thing has never happened before in Division I-A ball, and I have no idea how it happened last Saturday. But I’m really glad I was there for it.

Backing up a few steps, it’s important to have a good handle on the state of the MSU football program to really grasp the bizarre magnitude of this comeback. Viewing from a distance, you may be aware of macro trends, such as “Michigan State’s football program is consistently in shambles,” but there’s more at play here than that. As I see it, there are three primary characteristics of MSU football circa 2006:

1. MSU does not come back from double-digit deficits. We cough them up with impressive regularity (see: Notre Dame ’06, Michigan ’05, Ohio State ’05, etc.), but we absolutely do not come from behind to win football games.

2. MSU can usually be counted on to do each of the following every season: a) win two games we have no business winning; b) lose three games that we have no business losing. This phenomenon is what makes our teams more interesting to watch for the casual observer than, say, Minnesota, who is just consistently mediocre. Michigan State is mediocre over time, but on gameday itself, we are usually either amazing or a train wreck.

3. During the John L. Smith era, MSU fans have come to expect one of two types of seasons: a) those that start off promisingly, and then spin into an uncontrollable and shameful loss-vortex during the Notre Dame game, and b) those that start off promisingly, continue promisingly for a few more games, and then spin into an uncontrollable and shameful loss-vortex during the Michigan game. Last season, when we beat Notre Dame in South Bend, was an example of season type B. This year, after losing to Notre Dame, we experienced crushing defeats at the hands of Michigan, Ohio State, and, um, Illinois (see point #2b above). So 2006 certainly appeared to be a textbook example of season type A.

Somehow, though, those kids turned all that around, however briefly, in Evanston. State bucked all three of the characteristics described above by coming back from a huge deficit, beating a team we should have beaten, and putting the brakes on another season-long collapse.

Drew Stanton (above) looked like the best quarterback in the Big Ten again, and nobody gave up. As the fourth quarter went on, a victory seemed somehow both impossible and inevitable; every three or four minutes, we were in the end zone again until Chris and I finally looked up and saw a lead on the scoreboard. By that point, we both agreed that John L. deserved another year.

For that alone, it was a really, really strange afternoon.

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This week, 4-1! For the year, 22-8! As Mike Wilbon would say, “who’s your boy?!” Except for the Florida Gators punking out against Auburn, the Pundit’s college football prognostication genius is evident again. Is any more bragging about the sheer magnificence of the pundit necessary? Bow down, freshman football waterboys!

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THE PUNDIT’S POWER FIVE

1. Ohio State. Hmmm… the Pundit calls a win by 3-4 TDs and gets it. Damn, is the Pundit good or what?!?!
Next week’s opponent: Indiana
Prediction: The Hoosiers made Iowa look stupid this past week but won’t do it again Troy Smith & Co. The Buckeyes will win by 28 or more. The only concern for them at this point is getting bored before the Michigan game.

2. USC. The Sun Devils were quite a bit sharper (haha) than the Pundit thought they would be, and the Trojans struggled… but still won.
Next week’s Opponent: Bye
Prediction: N/A

3. West Virginia. Syracuse looked scrappy in the first half, but the Mountaineers pulled away in the second half, as predicted. Who is your daddy? The Pundit… that’s right.
Next week’s opponent: UConn
Prediction: The Huskies are a I-AA team trying like hell to get people to believe they are a I-A squad. WVU won’t struggle in this one and will win by 35 in a rout.

4. Michigan. Even without Mario “Mr. TD” Manningham (pictured), the Wolverines topped Penn State in a close one. Again, the Pundit was only off by three points. The Pundit is even better than HE thought!
Next week’s opponent: Iowa
Prediction: The Hawkeyes will rebound from their unexplainable loss to Indiana and give Michigan a good game. However, the Pundit sees the Wolverines taking this one by 10 with their solid all around attack.

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Mitch Cozad, a.k.a. the knife-wielding punter at the University of Northern Colorado, officially has competition for weirdest college football story of the year.

The University of Wisconsin put its marching band on probation for hazing and general rowdiness involving alcohol and sexual acts, school officials said.

The school’s chancellor, John Wiley, said a band member was pressured into shaving his head in a hazing incident, while other members danced semi-nude during the band’s trip to the University of Michigan on September 23.

“It has become increasingly clear that certain types of sexualized and hazing behavior are an ingrained part of the band’s culture,” Wiley said. “We will not provide an ongoing venue for this inappropriate and demeaning behavior.”

The band’s antics have gotten so notorious that the UW athletic department reportedly set aside money so cheerleaders and the dance squad can travel in separate buses to avoid harassment.

In an October 3 letter, Wiley told band’s director, Michael Leckrone, to clean up the program, which he has led for 38 years.

Two days later, Wiley warned the band’s 300 members that they risked losing travel and performance privileges. Most reports of misconduct during the Michigan trip involved one of seven buses returning home.

“We had multiple reports of highly sexualized banter taking place that made several women in particular feel quite uncomfortable. We had dancing and disrobing taking place that made some people feel not only uncomfortable but unsafe,” said an eyewitness.

The head-shaving incident was reported by a faculty member who believed “the individual would have preferred to keep his hair.” Separately, the school said it is investigating a sexual harassment complaint against a band staff member. No other details have been released at this time.

Hopefully, the scandal involving these crazy marching band hooligans won’t disrupt Wisconsin’s fine season. The Badgers, who throttled Minnesota yesterday, 48-12, to retain Paul Bunyan’s axe (how many absurd traditions can one conference have?) are quietly 6-1 to date and nipping at the heels of Michigan and Ohio State in the Big Ten.

These guys need to concentrate on football, not the drinking and odd sexual exploits of its spirited pep band. Come on, guys. Every group of college kids knows that if you’re going to haze people and act like jackasses, at least keep it on the down-low.

This is a sad story — not because of what happened to the “victims,” but because the band was dumb enough to get caught. Based on its own personal experiences with hazing, The Sports Truth advises the parties who filed complaints in the Wisconsin band case to man up.

Really now. Who among us hasn’t had our head shaved or been forced to run around naked in sub-zero temperatures? Or been drenched in hot sauce? Grow a pair.

[Cue The Pundit’s Patented Loud, Booming Voice, Pulsating Intro Music and Pyrotechnics]

So, 3-2 this week and 18-7 for the year. Hey, the Pundit will take it that record any day, especially when making a gutsy upset call against the USC Trojans. The only real shock to the Pundit was the futility displayed by Auburn (see below). Confidence… slightly bruised, but not broken after a tough week. By the way, if you picked Auburn to lose this weekend you are full of sh!t and you and the Pundit know it. Holla!

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THE PUNDIT’S POWER FIVE

1. Ohio State. The Bowling Green Eagles made for another bird defeathered courtesy of the Buckeyes. Can they do no wrong?
Next week’s opponent: Michigan State
Prediction: The Pundit doesn’t see the Buckeyes getting stopped here. Great teams take tough conference opponents and chew them up. And no one is even calling Michigan State tough this year. Ohio State by 3-4 TDs.

2. USC. The Huskies came very close in this one, which shows, if nothing else, that Ty Willingham can spark one-year turnarounds better than anyone in the game. The Pundit missed on the upset, but should get some props to have the sack to call it in the first place.
Next week’s opponent: Arizona State
Prediction: The Sun Devils’ horn and fork are somewhat dull this year. USC, with Dwayne Jarrett (right) back inb the lineup, shouldn’t have too much problem with them. Trojans by 21.

3. West Virginia. The Mississippi State Bulldogs are atrocious, so the Mountaineers get little love for beating a team that they are supposed to crush handily. The Pundit was expecting an bigger rout.
Next week’s opponent: Syracuse
Prediction: Syracuse has been playing better and the Mountaineers have been uninspired of late. West Virginia will struggle again, but will pull this one out in the second half. Mountaineers by 14.

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[Cue The Pundit’s Patented Loud, Booming Voice, Pulsating Intro Music and Pyrotechnics]

4-0 this week! 15-5 for the year! To quote those Guinness commercials, “Brilliant!” The Pundit’s record stands for itself.

All you Pundit fans may now drink a Guinness in honor of thine omnipotence. All the nay-sayers can stick to the Beast Ice — including the creators of this third-class technological abomination (the Pundit’s unnecessary big word usage counter is still missing… the Pundit swears this site is designed by f@&%ing chimps).

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THE PUNDIT’S POWER FIVE

1. Ohio State. The Hawkeyes got plucked by Ohio State, 38-17, and again the Pundit looks like the man for getting the score pretty close. Sign of a trend this week?
Next week’s opponent: Bowling Green
Prediction: This game was scheduled to give the Buckeyes a break in the Big 10 grind. The Falcons might have had a shot with the QB they had this year, but the Buckeyes will leave another opponent featherless in Week 6. Ohio State by 28.

2. Auburn. Okay… This game came down to the final play, but realistically Auburn controlled it throughout, except for a few big plays. The Gamecocks get an A for effort, but are one season away from winning a game like this. It’s coming though, mark the Pundit’s words.
Next week’s Opponent: Arkansas
Prediction: The Razorbacks are 3-1, but have barely beaten a down ‘Bama, a traditional lightweight in Vanderbilt, and winless Utah State. Only a miracle effort by Arkansas wonder boy Mitch Mustaine will give them a chance. The Pundit expects Tommy Tuberville (pictured) and his Tigers to make a fine southern BBQ out of the Razorbacks. Tigers by 21.

3. West Virginia. The Mountaineers were idle last week. YAWN!
Next week’s opponent: Mississippi State
Prediction: The only chance that the bite-less Bulldogs have is that it is a home game and that they catch the Mountaineers sleeping after a bye week. One word describes Mississippi State this year: horrendous. The Pundit predicts 200 yards and 4 TDs for Steve Slaton of WVU.

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Can anyone challenge the Pundit’s football acumen? The Pundit mocks anyone who thinks they can even attempt to hold his jock when it comes to college football.

Since the Pundit is affiliated with a technically deficient site (one probably run by chimps randomly punching keyboards) he will track his own record to make sure his legion of hungry fans can follow his omnipotence! 5-0 this week and 11-5 on the year! You have all been pimped again Pundit-style! Bow down, mere mortals!

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THE PUNDIT’S POWER FIVE

1. Ohio State. The Pundit took the Buckeyes by 21 over Penn State. Damn, the Pundit is good!
Next week’s opponent: Iowa
Prediction: This should be one of the early Big 10 grudge matches. A win for the Hawkeyes would get them into the top 10 nationally and give them some title hype. It’s a home game for Iowa but the Pundit is not convinced they’re strong enough to derail early Heisman front-runner Troy Smith (right) & Co. Buckeyes by 10.

2. Auburn. The Tigers got bored about one minute into their game against I-AA Buffalo and went through the motions to get the victory. It wasn’t a total romp because the third-stringers probably played the whole second half. Can you tell the Pundit didn’t watch this one?
Next week’s opponent: South Carolina
Prediction: This is a home game for the Gamecocks, but the Pundit is not sniffing an upset. Spurrier has made them respectable again but not against this defense. Auburn will win in entertaining but decisive fashion.

3. West Virginia. This should have been a blowout in the Pundit’s mind, but the Mountaineers struggled mightily in topping Maryland. The Mountaineers need all the big wins they can get because of a weaker schedule, so they lose some face with this one.
Next week’s opponent: Idle
Random Thought: This could be a sign of trouble for West Virginia. Most teams want their byes after a tough conference matchup, not after some patsy. Could this early bye end up hurting them? The Pundit is just throwing that thought out there…

4. USC. The Trojans looked flat in a victory over Arizona, as its offense lacked the normal sizzle. They can’t afford this type of performance against a real team. Sorry Tedy… not.
Next week’s opponent: Washington State
Prediction: Washington State is 3-1 and seems to have turned the corner after a long rebuilding process initiated by Bill Doba. However, they barely squeaked by Baylor and handily beat two weaker teams in Idaho and Stanford. The Pundit thinks the Cougars will give the Trojans a good game but look for a big day from Dwayne Jarrett and John David Booty. Trojans by 21 in a high-scoring shootout.

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