Lance Armstrong Completes NYC Marathon, Barely Covers Spread
November 6th, 2006 by Michael Stephens
Seven-time Tour de France winner Lance Armstrong is branching out these days. In this picture, Lance is shown gutting out the last 100-yard dash to the finish during the New York City Marathon Sunday, crossing the finish line in 2:59:36.
Naturally, Lance beat his personal goal of three hours — and managed to barely cover the official spread of 56:12 over the Sports Truth’s own Jane Murray, who completed the 26.2-mile course in a still-impressive 3:56:29.
Despite failing to beat Lance (to the chagrin of sports betting fiends everywhere), Murray, a native of Long Island, was satisfied with her effort in breaking her personal goal of four hours flat.
“Yes, very much so,” said Murray, 25, when asked if she was pleased with her performance. “I was also pleased by the crowd’s reaction to my ‘Eat it, Lance’ sign.”
As for Armstrong, he chose not to engage in a war of words, focusing instead on the “respectable” time he posted in his first marathon.
“I think I bit off more than I could chew. I thought the marathon would be easier,” said Armstrong, who had no comment on Murray’s time.
Excuse me, but what running novice turns in a sub-three-hour marathon, then says afterward that they thought it would be easier? Unbelievable. This guy has a lot of nerve. And steroids. Lots and lots of steroids.
For his next trick, Lance will compile the 10,000 signatures required to get his name the ballot, stage a grass-roots write-in campaign, and become elected Governor of Texas in tomorrow’s elections.
March 11th, 2007 at 11:40 am
Come on guys. Lance started his athletic career as a triathlete, so hes not a novice runner. He got a sub three hour time because of his incredible physical fitness, but he also said later that it was so painful that he’d never do it again. He was amazed at the people who could win these races. Why don’t you just leave the man alone. He gets enough shit from Europeans for dominating “their” race.
April 11th, 2007 at 7:40 pm
well, Lance is the most drug tested athlete on the planet…I highly doubt that he would be stupid enough to ruin an athletically perfect body with steriods. second, the guy rides over 5000 (thats FIVE THOUSAND) miles a year….don’t go expecting him to be intimidated by a measly 26 miles. Lance is a legend and nobody will ever remember your name. Now move on with your pathetic existence…