This Week in College Football: Trojans Are Back
September 21st, 2006 by The PunditOkay… The Pundit admits a bad week on his Power Five predictions.
Surprise upsets and unexpected humiliations are what college football is all about after all. Even The Pundit loses once in awhile. However, all of you Pundit fans, have faith. The editor of this site will vouch that The Pundit was a little queasy on Notre Dame late in the week, so any Pundit-bashers can still kiss his holier-than-thou a$$.
[Cue the Drum Roll]
THE PUNDIT’S POWER FIVE
1. Ohio State. Cincinnati Bearcats? The last time they were relevant in college football was… oops, they have never been. The Buckeyes were looking past them with their slow start last week.
Next week’s opponent: Penn State
Prediction: The Pundit wasn’t impressed with the Nittany Lions against Notre Dame. Ohio State should romp at home and win by three touchdowns at least.
2. West Virginia. Maryland? Ha! Steve Slaton made ol’ Ralphie look like a fool for not giving him a ride (and he wanted to go to Maryland).
Next week’s opponent: East Carolina
Prediction: Some people are probably questioning the ranking here, but The Pundit believes the Mountaineers are that good. They will dispatch the Pirates with little trouble.
3. Auburn. They took out LSU, 7-3, and made The Pundit look bad. This is a solid team across the board with a particularly nasty defense.
Next week’s Opponent: Buffalo
Prediction: The Tigers scheduled the laughingstock of Division I-A football (aside from Temple that is) to get a breather in their tough SEC schedule. This is a 70-0 score waiting to happen. Get ready second- and third- stringers, you’ll get a chance to show your stuff this weekend.
4. USC. The Pundit has been dreading this day, but it has to happen — the Trojans are back in the Power Five. Pete Carroll (pictured) is a great coach and has got his team cruising after losing a ton of NFL talent. The Pundit still wonders, every time the Trojans win, what would happen if they played in the SEC.
Next week’s opponent: Arizona
Prediction: Tedy Bruschi’s alma mater won’t get any love this year with this schedule. Trojans by 30 in a snoozefest.
5. Florida and Michigan (tie). The Gators got by a talented Tennessee team while Michigan cost Brady Quinn the Heisman in South Bend. The Pundit thinks Tennessee is overrated, and that Notre Dame’s secondary didn’t get any better, so the quality of these wins is suspect.
Next week’s opponents: Kentucky and Michigan, respectively
Prediction: Kentucky stinks and Urban Meyer should get an easier win this week. Wisconsin is tough but the Michigan offense will be hard to stop at home.
Teams most likely to break into the Top Five: Louisville (they blasted Miami, a sleeper pick) and Georgia (looking tougher and tougher each week).
TEAMS THAT SCREWED UP BIG THIS WEEKEND
Miami: The ‘Canes season is over with two losses. Coker had better get his resume ready!
Florida State: They had all the momentum needed to smash into the Power Five and chase the national title with a dominant win over Miami, but then lost to Clemson after being ahead for three quarters.
Notre Dame: Does The Pundit even need to say why? Charlie, recruit some defensive backs already! White guys with mohawks may stop the run, but they can’t cover the pass.
GAMES OF THE WEEK
After all the big games last week, it figures that this week would suck. The Pundit recommends going golfing or fishing this weekend because there is nothing really worth watching. Well, unless you are one of those car flag-waving SEC looneys… celebrate the easy wins with pride, losers.
AND THE WHAT THE F*#@?!?! AWARDS GO TO…
… Pete Rose! The Pundit realizes that this is not football related, but old Petey gets the honor for signing some balls saying “I’m sorry I bet on baseball.” Are you kidding us, Pete? After all these years of claiming innocence! You are a Class A douchebag of the highest order. The Pundit asks, what the f*#@ were you thinking?!?!?!
… University of Oklahoma president David Boren! The Pundit realizes that OU got hosed on two officiating errors, costing them an almost certain win. But demanding that a game be expunged from the record books and the officials suspended for the year is obnoxious bullsh!t.
The Pundit has never heard of such a thing from teams that have gotten the screw job from officials in the past. Grow up and shut up you giant turd. Let’s see you try and ref a college football game. The Pundit asks you, David Boren, what the f*#@ were you thinking?!?!?!
