The Sports Truth

The Sports Truth is proud to bring you The Weigh-In, in which we break down prospective matchups within the world of sports (and sometimes pop culture) that you may never have considered. Because they are pointless, and above all, not real.

Our newest edition is a showdown of pro football stars who claim the nickname LT. Who will come out on top in 10-round bout between NFL legend Lawrence Taylor and possible future NFL legend LaDainian Tomlinson? Let’s take a look:

1. RAW TALENT

Lawrence Taylor: Widely considered one of the greatest defensive players in NFL history due to his dominance and the impact of his presence offenses
LaDainian Tomlinson: Widely considered one of the best running backs in the NFL with combination of power, speed and versatility
Edge: Even

2. COLLEGE CAREER

Lawrence Taylor: Broke numerous defensive records at North Carolina, which would later retire his jersey
LaDainian Tomlinson: Heisman Trophy finalist as a senior at TCU; ran for 5,263 career yards, ranking sixth in Division I history; Holds NCAA records for most rushing yards in a game (406).
Edge: LaDainian

3. FIRST FIVE SEASONS

Lawrence Taylor: Three NFL Defensive Player of the Year awards, one NFL Defensive Rookie of the Year award, one NFL MVP award
LaDainian Tomlinson: 7,361 rushing yards, 9,753 total yards, NFL record 80 touchdowns
Edge: Even

4. FANTASY FOOTBALL VALUE

Lawrence Taylor: No matter how great, defensive players just aren’t worth that much
LaDainian Tomlinson: Irreplaceable
Edge: LaDainian

5. TEAM ACHIEVEMENTS

Lawrence Taylor: Giants went 9-4 in the playoffs with Taylor suiting up, winning two Super Bowls
LaDainian Tomlinson: Chargers have made one playoff appearance in LT’s career, losing to the Jets
Edge: Lawrence

6. UNORTHODOX TACTICS

Lawrence Taylor: Sending hookers to opposing players’ hotels the night before the game
LaDainian Tomlinson: Throwing halfback pass, diving over the pile from several yards away to score TDs
Edge: Lawrence

7. GOLF GAME

Lawrence Taylor: Plays every damn day, but gambles excessively
LaDainian Tomlinson: Hosts annual LaDainian Tomlinson Celebrity Invitational Golf Tournament to raise money for local charities
Edge: Even

8. STREET CRED

Lawrence Taylor: Once claimed he did not know anyone who wasn’t a prostitute, drug dealer or thug
LaDainian Tomlinson: Tough dude, but squeaky clean
Edge: Lawrence

9. PERSONAL QUOTE

Lawrence Taylor: “Let’s go out there like a bunch of crazed dogs, baby! Woo!”
LaDainian Tomlinson: “Some people say I’m the best back in the NFL, that’s what drives you me… you want everyone saying there’s no doubt who’s the best.”
Edge: Lawrence

10. BIGGEST CRITICISM

Lawrence Taylor: Engaged in almost unthinkable excess
LaDainian Tomlinson: Shoplifts nicknames
Edge: LaDainian

THE VERDICT: The younger LT battled gamely, but there can be only one… and nothing beats the original, who escapes with a 5.5-4.5 victory. He probably bet on it, too — the opening line was Lawrence (-1).

Posted in LaDainian Tomlinson, Lawrence Taylor, NFL, The Weigh-In